


Alone together

by like_froot



Category: Paladins: Champions Of The Realm (Video Game)
Genre: Angst and Fluff and Smut, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Study, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Mental Health Issues, No Beta, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-12
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-05-01 23:48:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19187707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/like_froot/pseuds/like_froot
Summary: Strix realises, Viktor makes him feel alive.





	Alone together

**Author's Note:**

> *tired voice* fuc

It’s not usual for them to get to spend time like this. Alone, together. After the Sentinels disbanded, Karne did his darned best not to let them work together often. Maybe as a price to pay for their own incompetence. Maybe because deep down, Karne himself knew what they both had, and considered it a weakness.

 

Bullshit. Both of them know that. Viktor fights at ease when he knows that there is someone taking care of him from above. Strix works better when he is under the command of someone he trusts to make the best choices. That’s just how it works. And anyone who worked with them back in the day would know that.

 

It’s easier to just meet when both of them are free, can enjoy each other’s company, and then hit their usual motel. Nothing fancy, just enough space for both of them, enough privacy to just be themselves in peace.

 

Strix sighs against Viktor’s lips, Viktor’s hands on his cheeks, keeping him close. Wanting him closer. And Strix may be a sniper, not used to proximity, but he’s doing his best. As always. His eyes do not focus on Viktor’s face at first, slowly gaining the confidence to do so as he gets comfortable with Viktor’s touch. Always slow, as if they had all the time in the world.

 

As if there wasn’t a literal war closer than ever. As if they could just stop and enjoy the married life they both wish they could have.

 

“I love you.” Viktor murmurs, and Strix’s hands are on his shirt, unbuttoning it with more urgency than he would have liked to admit. They are not wearing their usual attire, trying to keep it casual. Giving it a sense of normalcy.

 

Neither of them is sure if it’s truly working, but they don’t really care anymore.

 

They get rid of each other’s clothes, slowly, their hearts heavy with want and love, their mouths locked together, looking for warmth, for support.

 

“Sir?” Strix asks, his face feeling exposed without his usual warpaint. He can feel himself hot, and that’s probably showing on his skin. Not that Viktor comments on it. He never does, unless he wants to make him blush even harder.

 

Viktor’s expression looks both tender and a little sad, and Strix kisses him again, as a subtle apology.

 

The bed is comfortable enough, even if it’s not too big. It’s nothing out of the ordinary, with sheets that are not quite white anymore, and that smell of cheap soap. It’s perfect for them, so used to sleep on the hard, cold ground. There's no luxuries like lube, either.

 

Not that Strix cares that much about things like the bed per say, not when there is someone way warmer embracing him like he is precious.

 

Viktor puts him on top of him, because he likes Strix to just take the initiative. To separate work from these moments, as much as they can. Strix knows another truth, though. Viktor just loves the sight of Strix’s hair from below, messier than usual.

 

“Beautiful. You’re just… you’re just amazing.” Viktor murmurs, his thick accent even more noticeable because of how flustered he feels. Strix smiles at him slightly, Viktor's big hand on his cheek and lower, gently caressing the corner of his lips.

 

“You always know what to say.” Strix remarks, because it’s true. Viktor always showers him with compliments, no matter the place or moment. It’s a talent that Strix doesn’t share, always terrible at words. Not really speaking much unless he feels he has to.

 

At that, Viktor just chuckles deeply. The voice of an older man. Strix wonders if he sounds like that, too. A little tired, no matter how much energy they both put into everything.

 

“You can always try. I’m not going to laugh.”

 

Strix gets closer to him, their lips almost touching, their breaths warm against each other, to the point that they do not know which one belongs to whom.

 

“I know.” Strix mutters, and Viktor kisses him, like he cannot take it anymore.

 

It’s hot, Strix thinks. The way Viktor’s hand plays with his hair, while the other one circles around the skin of his hip. Their tongues caressing each other, slow and knowing. Their lips pressed together like they don’t want to be separated again, because of how they have missed each other.

 

Strix’s hand gently touches Viktor’s neck, feeling its thickness, its firm muscles. Viktor smiles in the middle of the kiss, because if there’s something they both like about each other’s bodies, that’s muscles.

 

Viktor’s hand gently cups Strix’s butt, and then goes lower, feeling Strix’s thigh.

 

“You have been taking care of yourself, as always.”

 

Strix nods, somewhere between proud and a little bashful.

 

“I have to deal with the recoil somehow.”

 

Viktor groans, a little melodramatically. Strix loves that about him. How open he is, how honest. How he doesn’t care about rank, or position. He just cares, in many other ways. More gentle ways. More human.

 

“You snipers and your… sniping. I swear to the gods.”

 

Strix chuckles a little, moving his neck slightly, as if to invite Viktor to touch him. Viktor complies wholeheartedly.

 

It’s warm and wet against his skin, and Strix suppresses the impulse of just taking the whole matter into his hands. He feels himself getting hard as Viktor sucks on his adam’s apple. He would think that Viktor’s teasing him if he didn’t know him any better.

 

“Already wanting me?” Viktor asks, and this time, he is teasing Strix slightly.

 

Strix goes straight to the point, as always.

 

“I always want you.” he answers, and he can feel Viktor freeze for a second, his skin getting warmer and warmer. Strix feels tempted to touch him to check how his words have affected him.

 

“So straightforward.” Viktor says, admiration in his voice. “That’s what I liked about you the most, when we first met. You have never made me second-guess your intentions.”

 

Strix hums lowly, warmth pooling inside of his chest, but not only.

 

“You liked me from the very beginning.”

 

It’s not a question, but Viktor answers regardless. Not like Strix didn't feel the same way back then. Thinking about his commander in ways that were far from professional.

 

“Yes. I did. Of course I did.”

 

“You have strange tastes, Viktor.”

 

The aforementioned lights up when he hears his own name, and not any kind of allusion to his rank. It’s a bad habit that Strix has to force himself to forget when they’re in private. It doesn’t always work.

 

“I have been told.”

 

Strix sighs at his tenderness, running out of patience. Something strange, given his own nature and his job.

 

“Touch me.” he mutters, his face feeling hot. Viktor half smiles at him, the gesture looking beautiful on his rough features, his small eyes glinting with genuine love.

 

“I’d love to.”

 

Strix embraces him as they kiss again, almost chucking when Viktor touches his arm, feeling it thoroughly, almost at the same time that Strix touches the muscles on Viktor’s back.

 

Sadly, it doesn’t last forever. Not that what comes after that isn’t more than good in itself.

 

Strix sits on the bed, his hair not even braided anymore because of how much Viktor likes to touch it. Viktor positions himself between his legs, kneeling. He takes an extra amount of time to just touch Strix’s legs, thumbs caressing his inner thighs slowly. Strix shudders slightly, and Viktor smiles at him.

 

“I love you.” Strix confesses, his voice low, but Viktor can hear him perfectly.

 

“I know. I know.” Viktor answers, a little overwhelmed, so Strix encourages him, a hand on his cheek, the other sweetly touching Viktor’s nape, enjoying the shaved hair. “Me too.”

 

It works.

 

Viktor’s mouth feels good against his shoulder, and Strix would murmur words of encouragement if he was better at words. As he is, he just sighs and nods, telling him to continue, to keep tasting his skin.

 

As Viktor smiles against his chest, and then his stomach, Strix just wonders, his skin bristling. Who knew that wolves and owls worked this well together.

 

Strix shudders when he feels Viktor’s lips on his abdomen. Slow and careful, still making enough pressure for Strix to feel his own body boiling. Viktor’s hands are on his thighs, keeping them a little apart, so he can do what he has been dying to do for who knows how long.

 

When he finally does it, Strix squirms a little, a deep sound leaving his lips. Viktor laughs a little, his voice reverberating against Strix’s skin. Always so loud, and supportive.

 

Always the thoughtful one, Viktor treats him with care. A warm tongue against him, hands still on Strix thighs, sensing his every move. Every twitch. Strix tries to keep his breath steady, forcing himself to remember how to calm himself down. He has always been good at that. A nervous sniper is as good as a dead sniper, after all.

 

He tentatively reaches out for one of Viktor’s hands, and Viktor smiles as they entwine their fingers. Like they belong like this, together. Like they belonged together in the battlefield, and in each other’s life.

 

“You look good like this.”

 

Strix just chuckles a little, absentmindedly.

 

It’s strange, he thinks. He thought he would be numb forever because of his work. He doesn’t even feel that much anymore when he shoots, recoil reminding him what he is doing, that he is alive, while people are dying. A part of him feels disgusted by it. The rest of him is too goddamn tired to care too much.

 

He thinks about it, often. That maybe, he’s closer to a peaceful life with each shot. That the killing will stop one day, and that he will be able to live a regular life. With Viktor. Kinessa. Tyra. Everyone.

 

Not that he knows a life outside of all this senseless killing. He doesn’t know if he would be able to adapt. Not that he has ever been an optimistic man. Maybe he just needs a single shot to get the peaceful rest he desires. Maybe he will die fighting, as it would be expected. A part of himself entertains the idea a little too much. Another part of him just wants to be able to enjoy life, for once. Maybe.

 

“Stay with me, Ghost Feather.” he hears Viktor say, his hand tightening up its grip on Strix’s own.

 

Out of everyone, Viktor is the one who understands the best. Strix wonders if he is the only one who feels broken to a point of no return, or if it’s just that everyone else expresses it their own way. Realistically, he knows that he cannot be the only one who feels this effed up. No matter how lonely it feels most of the time.

 

“I’m here.” he assures Viktor, and he realises that his voice sounds a little off, probably because of how uneasy his breath feels.

 

A dead sniper, if he wasn’t in such good hands.

 

“Are you sure?” Viktor asks, and Strix uses his free hand to comb his short hair a little.

 

In the middle of all that numbness, Viktor is one of the few people who can make him feel actually alive.

 

“Yes. Go on.”

 

As Viktor takes him in his mouth, Strix just abandons himself to the feeling. He shudders and moans, a hand holding Viktor’s, who caresses it with his thumb. The other hand leaves Viktor’s hair, to grab the sheet almost desperately, trying to ground himself.

 

He can’t.

 

It has been a long time, he realises. Dreaming about Viktor’s touch. About how he makes Strix feel younger, less tired. He is getting way too desperate, and he lets Viktor know that he wants him faster instead, with a voice that doesn’t seem his anymore.

 

Viktor complies, and Strix outright whines this time.

 

Dark eyes look up at him, as if asking for some kind of confirmation or feedback. Strix just nods, slightly, a sigh trapped in his throat. He asks for more in a choked voice, and Viktor smiles in pure fondness.

 

That’s what sends a spark to Strix’s brain, shuddering in place, his numbness feeling a little less cold. Warmth pooling inside of him, tingling.

 

“Almost… Almost done, Vitya.”

 

Viktor would probably take him as he is, not worrying about his face or mouth getting dirty. As for Strix’s request, he doesn’t. He never does. He takes Strix in his hand, his eyes not leaving Strix’s own. He doesn’t really need much more to reach his limit.

 

When Strix comes, he feels his own legs shaking a little. His mouth not being able to contain his moans any longer, sounding hoarse, even deeper than usual. Not keeping himself in check anymore. Viktor hums in appreciation, and Strix half chuckles, half exhales.

 

“Thank you.” he says, without thinking, relieved and genuinely thankful. He sees Viktor’s smile just before he closes his eyes for a couple of seconds, trying to make his breath steadier, out of habit.

 

“My pleasure. As always.” Viktor admits effortlessly, probably shrugging as he speaks. Strix opens his eyes, still breathless, and points at his own lips, a little bashful. Viktor doesn’t hesitate to kiss them.

 

A part of him had warned him from the start. To get interested in his superior was not a smart move, but it happened regardless. To feel Viktor’s interest back was better than he would have expected.

 

Strix has never been a man made for softness or pleasure. No matter how much he craves it. No matter that his heart flutters, alive, when Viktor kisses his lips, his knuckles, anywhere. When he feels his hands caressing him, supporting him.

 

Maybe, if their circumstances had been different, they could have been entirely happy. Not worrying about a war. Not broken without remedy. No superiors, no ranks.

 

As Viktor moves from his lips to his cheek, and then his forehead, Strix knows that he understands. That they’re both hoping that maybe, they will be able to live that life one day. Even if Strix suspects he is way more pessimistic about it than Viktor.

 

“Give me a hand, Ghost Feather.” Viktor half jokes, pointing downwards with his thumb. It’s not an order, far from it. It just hurts less when they joke about it.

 

“Yessir.”

 

It definitely hurts less like this.

 

Strix likes looking at Viktor when he touches him, slowly taking him in his hand, always testing the amount of pressure. It feels strange to feel something against his palm, so used to his gloves. So used to not feeling much.

 

Viktor’s loud grunt interrupts his train of thoughts, luckily. As always. Making him a better version of himself, not letting him drown in his eternal tiredness. He knows that Viktor would say something similar about him, too.

 

“Good?” he asks, even if he knows, because he wants to make sure, because he wants Viktor to feel his care as much as Strix feels his. After Viktor nods, he puts a hand on Viktor’s nape, slowly getting him closer to kiss him again.

 

The sound Viktor makes when he fastens the pace will probably appear in his dreams quite often, at least for the next couple of months or so. Strix shudders, pressing a kiss against Viktor’s jaw, and then against the scar on his cheek. Viktor laughs at his gesture, because he knows. Because he feels the same.

 

“I… I love you.” Viktor confesses, his hands on Strix’s cheeks, gently moving to his black hair, caressing it with what looks like reverence.

 

Strix smiles a little, a tiny smile, knowing. One of his sweet smiles from when he thinks that nobody’s looking, but that he feels safe enough to share in front of Viktor.

 

“Me too.”

 

Viktor groans on top of him, gently thrusting against his hand, and Strix knows it won’t take him long to finish.

 

“It’s fine.” he assures, in a whisper. “The night is still young.”

 

 _They_ aren’t, though. Both of them know that. But this is not about sex, even if it _is_ something both of them have been looking forward to. Just the thought of Viktor’s arms around him, his sleepy kisses, his soft caresses, is enough for Strix to want to stay with him forever in that bed.

 

Viktor nods, and Strix keeps the pace, looking at him, at his face, until he literally feels Viktor’s whole body shudder, a loud moan escaping his lips.

 

He is hot, Strix thinks. The most handsome man in the entire fucking realm. With his wavering breath, his hair not in place anymore. His sweaty forehead, the scar on his cheek. His small, dark eyes, looking at Strix with a deep feeling that always catches him off guard, and makes him feel safe at the same time.

 

Viktor almost collapses on top of him, but Strix doesn’t really mind, as long as they are close.

 

Strix kisses Viktor’s nose, leaving him room to breathe. And as Viktor manages to utter a single word of gratitude, as if to tease him a little, Strix feels himself relaxing, his lips moving to Viktor’s temple.

 

“My pleasure.”

**Author's Note:**

> Owl man makes me like, super sad, I really hope they both get to live a happy life after everything's over. Retirement and all that jazz


End file.
